Postpartum
Congratulations! Mazal Tov!
Your family is one person more precious!
How is your recovery?
Are you sleeping? Eating? Drinking?
How are your Husband and other children adjusting?
Are you Breastfeeding or Bottlefeeding? How's it going?
Now that you are home, happy with your new baby and working at settling in- there really is more help for you!
Families, today, are mobile. For many reasons, people move away from where they grew up. So there's a good chance, you might live far away from your family, those who might who have helped in this time of transition. Pospartum Doula care is now available in Israel- trained women help you and your family adjust to home life with a new baby.
Smart and Simple. Efficient. Caring and Supporting.
Read on to help you focus on what you need.
Baby’s Coming: What do you really need?
Support & Sanity Savers
Basics
In preparing for a new baby, many expectant parents spend hours shopping for baby clothes, decorating the nursery, and deciding which car seat to buy. Yet most don’t think much about what the reality of parenting a newborn will be like, and what they need to make it through that. So, here is the advice of experienced parents. We know you’ll read this, and think they’re exaggerating, I don’t really need that.. Just trust us on these, OK? Plan for all of this, and if it turns out you don’t need it, come back and teach us how you did it!
Must-Haves (Once baby’s survival needs are met, make sure you attend to your own survival needs!)
Sleep
An average newborn sleeps 16-18 hours per day, over 6-7 sleep periods, rarely more than three hours at a time. It is normal and healthy for a newborn to wake several times at night... but really hard on parents!!
Naps. Prioritize sleep above any responsibilities like: cleaning house, visiting friends, running errands, etc. Sleep whenever baby sleeps. If you can’t nap, at least have restful times when baby eats. The more rest you get, the more patient you will be, the more emotionally stable, and the better at solving problems.
Optional: A sleep book. There are lots of books and other sources for advice on how to get your baby to sleep more. Some are helpful, many just create more stress. We recommend: The No Cry Sleep Solution by Elizabeth Pantley.
Food
You may not have realized it would be difficult to eat when you have a newborn. Yet, when we talk to countless new parents, they say things like "it may be 2:00 pm when I realize I haven't had breakfast yet".. Or "every time we sit down to dinner, baby needs to eat, and my food gets cold, so I don.t bother to eat it".
Finger food. Before baby is born, stock up with one months worth of food that:
1) you can eat with one hand while holding a baby,
2) doesn.t need to be prepped,
3) is good hot or cold,
4) doesn.t spoil when left out for a few hours, and
5) you like to eat.
Think about: nuts, dried fruit, granola bars, pretzels, jerky, yogurt, baby carrots, sugar snap peas, apples, bananas, crackers, cheese and crackers, string cheese, calzone or frozen burritos to microwave, garden burgers and sandwiches to put in the toaster, yogurt drinks, etc.
Emotional Support
Know who to call when you’re stressed out.Parenting a newborn is very challenging work. There are times when it totally overwhelms your normal coping abilities. EVERY NEW PARENT NEEDS TO HAVE A PLAN FOR WHO TO CALL WHEN THEY JUST CAN.T COPE ANY MORE. (And it has to be someone other than the baby’s other parent!) Before baby is born, get a business sized card to tuck into your wallet: write on it the name and phone number of a friend or family member you can call for support. put it on the ridge, on your nightstand program the number in your phone...
Post-partum depression. If you have a personal or family history of depression or mental illness, or if you have a lot of stress in your life right now (e.g. recent move, recent job loss, death in the family, divorce, etc.) then you are at greater risk of postpartum depression. Make sure you.re aware of the signs and symptoms, and before birth, talk to friends about the signs of postpartum depression so they know how to help you watch out for it.
Really, Really Helpful (Plan for them! Make sure they happen often!!)
Physical Support with Taking Care of Yourselves:
Asking friends and family - Before a baby is born, set up a schedule of people who can come and visit and help out. Anytime anyone asks what they can do, sign them up for a day. When they get there their job is not to take care of the baby ( that's your job and your joy). Their job is to take care of you. If you don't have anyone you can call on for support, look into hiring a postpartum doula.
Postpartum doulas: Are professionals at helping parents with caring for baby, caring for themselves, getting breastfeeding started, and helping with household tasks. Exact services and time needed depend on your needs. To recieve more information on Postpartum care, click here
Peer Support / Parent Groups
Why: One of the greatest things for new parents is to be around other new parents. Parent groups give you a chance to get new ideas and advice, get a sense of what is normal infant development by watching several babies learn and grow, share your stories of triumph and struggles with empathetic ears, and forgive your own mistakes when you realize all parents are learning by trial and error.
Where to find. There are many places you can meet other new parents: mommy and me exercise classes, mom and baby groups, La Leche League, infant massage classes, etc.
Time for your Relationship
It's easy to get so caught up in meeting baby’s immediate needs that it’s hard to find time to connect with your partner, and meet the needs of your relationship. It’s also easy to forget what quality time with your partner actually looks like. If you take your baby on a date, you’d be amazed how much of your couple time is spent feeding the baby, diapering the baby, admiring the baby, and talking about the baby.
Dating.
Try to take time for just the two of you. Babysitter tip: Sometimes when moms are breastfeeding a newborn, they find it hard to figure out how to schedule outings around baby.s unpredictable feeding schedules. Have the babysitter come for a three hour period. When she comes over, if baby has just eaten, you can leave right away, and come back in two hours. If baby hasn’t fed recently, you start the date at home. Once baby gets hungry and gets a good feeding in, you can head out for the rest of your date time.
Date Nights at Home.
If you can’t get out, at least set aside one evening a week to prioritize relationship: whenever baby dozes off or doesn’t have any immediate needs, spend a little time focusing on each other.
Potential conflicts.
The main relationship conflicts that come up for new parents are: issues related to intimacy, financial stresses, a feeling of an unfair division of household tasks, and conflicts in parenting styles. The more you can work on these issues before baby arrives, the better! If you feel like your relationship is struggling now, now is the time to seek counseling and support. Don’t expect having a baby to fix a challenged relationship. They usually make it harder to work on your relationship.
Fun and Frills (Don’t forget these and don’t feel guilty for indulging in them!)
Everyone has something in life that is a fun little treat that they do just for themselves. It may be: reading the morning paper, or going for a daily jog, or having coffee with a friend once a week, or fine chocolates, or bubble baths, or curling up with a good book, or..
Unless you do fun things for yourself every now and then, it’s hard to have the energy for fun with baby. Whatever your treats are, make sure you find a way to continue to indulge in them after baby is born. These little things are what can recharge you, and allow you to return to baby with a new joy.
Your family is one person more precious!
How is your recovery?
Are you sleeping? Eating? Drinking?
How are your Husband and other children adjusting?
Are you Breastfeeding or Bottlefeeding? How's it going?
Now that you are home, happy with your new baby and working at settling in- there really is more help for you!
Families, today, are mobile. For many reasons, people move away from where they grew up. So there's a good chance, you might live far away from your family, those who might who have helped in this time of transition. Pospartum Doula care is now available in Israel- trained women help you and your family adjust to home life with a new baby.
Smart and Simple. Efficient. Caring and Supporting.
Read on to help you focus on what you need.
Baby’s Coming: What do you really need?
Support & Sanity Savers
Basics
In preparing for a new baby, many expectant parents spend hours shopping for baby clothes, decorating the nursery, and deciding which car seat to buy. Yet most don’t think much about what the reality of parenting a newborn will be like, and what they need to make it through that. So, here is the advice of experienced parents. We know you’ll read this, and think they’re exaggerating, I don’t really need that.. Just trust us on these, OK? Plan for all of this, and if it turns out you don’t need it, come back and teach us how you did it!
Must-Haves (Once baby’s survival needs are met, make sure you attend to your own survival needs!)
Sleep
An average newborn sleeps 16-18 hours per day, over 6-7 sleep periods, rarely more than three hours at a time. It is normal and healthy for a newborn to wake several times at night... but really hard on parents!!
Naps. Prioritize sleep above any responsibilities like: cleaning house, visiting friends, running errands, etc. Sleep whenever baby sleeps. If you can’t nap, at least have restful times when baby eats. The more rest you get, the more patient you will be, the more emotionally stable, and the better at solving problems.
Optional: A sleep book. There are lots of books and other sources for advice on how to get your baby to sleep more. Some are helpful, many just create more stress. We recommend: The No Cry Sleep Solution by Elizabeth Pantley.
Food
You may not have realized it would be difficult to eat when you have a newborn. Yet, when we talk to countless new parents, they say things like "it may be 2:00 pm when I realize I haven't had breakfast yet".. Or "every time we sit down to dinner, baby needs to eat, and my food gets cold, so I don.t bother to eat it".
Finger food. Before baby is born, stock up with one months worth of food that:
1) you can eat with one hand while holding a baby,
2) doesn.t need to be prepped,
3) is good hot or cold,
4) doesn.t spoil when left out for a few hours, and
5) you like to eat.
Think about: nuts, dried fruit, granola bars, pretzels, jerky, yogurt, baby carrots, sugar snap peas, apples, bananas, crackers, cheese and crackers, string cheese, calzone or frozen burritos to microwave, garden burgers and sandwiches to put in the toaster, yogurt drinks, etc.
Emotional Support
Know who to call when you’re stressed out.Parenting a newborn is very challenging work. There are times when it totally overwhelms your normal coping abilities. EVERY NEW PARENT NEEDS TO HAVE A PLAN FOR WHO TO CALL WHEN THEY JUST CAN.T COPE ANY MORE. (And it has to be someone other than the baby’s other parent!) Before baby is born, get a business sized card to tuck into your wallet: write on it the name and phone number of a friend or family member you can call for support. put it on the ridge, on your nightstand program the number in your phone...
Post-partum depression. If you have a personal or family history of depression or mental illness, or if you have a lot of stress in your life right now (e.g. recent move, recent job loss, death in the family, divorce, etc.) then you are at greater risk of postpartum depression. Make sure you.re aware of the signs and symptoms, and before birth, talk to friends about the signs of postpartum depression so they know how to help you watch out for it.
Really, Really Helpful (Plan for them! Make sure they happen often!!)
Physical Support with Taking Care of Yourselves:
Asking friends and family - Before a baby is born, set up a schedule of people who can come and visit and help out. Anytime anyone asks what they can do, sign them up for a day. When they get there their job is not to take care of the baby ( that's your job and your joy). Their job is to take care of you. If you don't have anyone you can call on for support, look into hiring a postpartum doula.
Postpartum doulas: Are professionals at helping parents with caring for baby, caring for themselves, getting breastfeeding started, and helping with household tasks. Exact services and time needed depend on your needs. To recieve more information on Postpartum care, click here
Peer Support / Parent Groups
Why: One of the greatest things for new parents is to be around other new parents. Parent groups give you a chance to get new ideas and advice, get a sense of what is normal infant development by watching several babies learn and grow, share your stories of triumph and struggles with empathetic ears, and forgive your own mistakes when you realize all parents are learning by trial and error.
Where to find. There are many places you can meet other new parents: mommy and me exercise classes, mom and baby groups, La Leche League, infant massage classes, etc.
Time for your Relationship
It's easy to get so caught up in meeting baby’s immediate needs that it’s hard to find time to connect with your partner, and meet the needs of your relationship. It’s also easy to forget what quality time with your partner actually looks like. If you take your baby on a date, you’d be amazed how much of your couple time is spent feeding the baby, diapering the baby, admiring the baby, and talking about the baby.
Dating.
Try to take time for just the two of you. Babysitter tip: Sometimes when moms are breastfeeding a newborn, they find it hard to figure out how to schedule outings around baby.s unpredictable feeding schedules. Have the babysitter come for a three hour period. When she comes over, if baby has just eaten, you can leave right away, and come back in two hours. If baby hasn’t fed recently, you start the date at home. Once baby gets hungry and gets a good feeding in, you can head out for the rest of your date time.
Date Nights at Home.
If you can’t get out, at least set aside one evening a week to prioritize relationship: whenever baby dozes off or doesn’t have any immediate needs, spend a little time focusing on each other.
Potential conflicts.
The main relationship conflicts that come up for new parents are: issues related to intimacy, financial stresses, a feeling of an unfair division of household tasks, and conflicts in parenting styles. The more you can work on these issues before baby arrives, the better! If you feel like your relationship is struggling now, now is the time to seek counseling and support. Don’t expect having a baby to fix a challenged relationship. They usually make it harder to work on your relationship.
Fun and Frills (Don’t forget these and don’t feel guilty for indulging in them!)
Everyone has something in life that is a fun little treat that they do just for themselves. It may be: reading the morning paper, or going for a daily jog, or having coffee with a friend once a week, or fine chocolates, or bubble baths, or curling up with a good book, or..
Unless you do fun things for yourself every now and then, it’s hard to have the energy for fun with baby. Whatever your treats are, make sure you find a way to continue to indulge in them after baby is born. These little things are what can recharge you, and allow you to return to baby with a new joy.